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Clean Jokes
Laughter is the best medicine as they say. This page is not
intended to degrade anybody's religion or belief but merely for
humor and laugh purposes only.
She wanted to make sure the campground was fully equipped, but didn't quite know how to ask about the toilet facilities. She just couldn't bring herself to write the word "toilet" in her letter. After much deliberation she finally came up with the old-fashioned term "bathroom commode." But when she wrote that down, she still felt that she was being too forward. So she started all over again, rewrote the entire letter, and referred to the bathroom commode merely as the B.C. "Does the campground have its own B.C.?" is what she finally wrote. Well, the campground owner wasn't old-fashioned at all, and when he got the letter he just couldn't figure out what the woman was talking about. That B.C. business really stumped him. After worrying about it for a while, he showed the letter to several campers, but no one could imagine what the lady meant, either. So the campground owner, finally coming to the conclusion that the lady must be asking about the location of the Baptist Church, sat down and wrote the following reply: Dear Madam: I regret very much the delay in answering your letter, but I now take the pleasure of informing you that a B.C. is located nine miles north of the campground, and is capable of seating 250 people at one time. I admit it is quite a distance away if you are in the habit of going regularly, but no doubt you will be pleased to learn that a great number of our people take their lunches along and make a day of it. They usually arrive early and stay late. If you don't start early, you probably will not make it in time. The last time my wife and I went was six years ago, and it was so crowded we had to stand up the whole time we were there. It may interest you to know that right now, there is a supper planned to raise money to buy more seats. They're going to hold it in the basement of the B.C. I would like to say it pains me very much not being able to go more often, but it surely is no lack of desire on my part. As we grow older, it seems to be more of an effort, particularly in cold weather. If you decide to come down to our campground, perhaps I could go with you the first time you go, sit with you, and introduce you to all the other folks. Remember, this is a friendly community!!
KITCHEN QUOTE No Husband Has Ever Been Shot While Doing The Dishes A Husband Is Someone Who Takes Out The Trash And Gives The Impression He Just Cleaned The Whole House If we are what we eat, then I'm easy, fast, and cheap. A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator. Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused. A Clean House Is A Sign Of A Misspent Life Help Keep the Kitchen Clean - Eat Out Housework Done Properly Can Kill You Countless Numbers Of People Have Eaten In This Kitchen and Gone On To Lead Normal Lives My next house will have no kitchen --- just vending machines
THE KEYBOARD RESTAURANT MENU
\&&&&&&&/ Pretzels!
\66666666/ Shrimp!
\********/ Popcorn!
^<**>^ ^<**>^ Hot steamed Maryland blue crabs : )
\_><{{{{">_/ Whole Fish Soup!!
[Notice how the eyes follow you around the room!]
[::] [::] [::] [::] Fig Newtons
(#) (#) (#) Warm Peanut butter cookies
\--------/ Chicken soup for all your sick friends
(@) (@) (@) Fresh Cinnamon Rolls!
OooOOoOooO Onion rings
[:::] [:::] [:::] French toast sticks with powdered sugar
=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D# Celery
\__/ \__/ Chinese Take Out
\ ) ) ) ) ) / (~~~~~) Chips and Dip
@@@@ (_) (_) (_) Chocolate Chip cookies and Moo juice ;)
(|=3D=3D=3D|)(|=3D=3D=3D|) Hot dogs
(m) (m) (_) (_) M&M's and Koolaid
o o o o o Single AND O O O O O Double Stuff Oreos!
<) <) <) <) <) Pizza!
c(__) c(__) Steaming mugs of hot cocoa!
//
(****) RootBeer Float!
\ /
l__I
[|||]D [|||]D Root Beer!
(_)D (_)D Freshly brewed coffee!
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